EMPIISA EYA MWENDA: Kuliza Abaana Abeesiga

Okwagala kugumiikiriza, okwagalana kubeera kwa kisa. Tekugira, tekuvaamu kwewaana, tekwefuula mukulu. Tekukola bubi, tekwekwasa bukakafu, tekusunguwala mangu, tekutereka byonoono ebyayitawo. Okwagala tekusanyukira bubi wabula kusanyukira mazima. Kwekuuma bulijjo, kwesiga bulijjo, kusuubira bulijjo, era kugumiikiriza okutuuka ku nkomerero. 1 Abakkolinso 13:4–7

Ebintu bitono nnyo mu bulamu ebyenkana obukulu, ebiyinza okuleeta essanyu eringi oba okumenya omutima, ng’okukuza abaana. Essuula eno egaba ebikozesebwa eby’enjawulo okukuyamba okwongera ku kwesiga kw’abaana bo, obuvumu bwabwe, n’okukkiriza gwe bali. Oyinza okubayamba okufuna obusobozi okubeera n’abantu abalala mu ngeri ennungi. Ekigendererwa kwe kubategeka babeere n’amaanyi ag’okukwata ku balala okusinga balala bwe babakwatako. Bw’okikola, bajja kuba bakakafu era beesigika. Buli gye babeera, tebalina kukankana era tebayinza kukankanyizibwa. Bw’otwala amagezi n’obujulizi buno mu ngeri ey’amazima, ojja kwetya kitono ku mwana wo okwegatta ku bantu abatali balungi — okuggyako ng’agezaako okubatuukako n’okubalaga okwagala kwa Yesu. Naye waliwo akalungi kamu: omuze guno gunaakwetaagisa okumala ebbanga ddene mu myaka 18 egy’omu maaso egy’obulamu bwa buli mwana.

Emyaka mingi nga tetunnaba kufumbiriganwa ne Char, nasaba nnyo era ne nnoonya mukazi gw’anfaananira, nga nteekateeka obulamu obw’obufumbo. Obulamu bwange ne Char bufudde bulungi okusinga bwe nalowooza, newaakubadde nga bw’otunula mu Ssuula 8, twalina okubeera n’obugendererwa obwenjawulo. Twasalawo n’obwegendereza nti tujja kusigala mikwano oluvannyuma lw’okufumbiriganwa — era ne tukola nnyo okubituukiriza. Naye ekintu ekisinga kunsanyusa mu bulamu kyabadde essanyu ly’okukuza abaana. Twawuliddeko obulungi ennyo buli mutendera gwe bayitamu. Twafuna ebiseera eby’okusituka n’okukula mu baana n’abantu abakulu. Buli mutendera — okuva ku baana abazaaliddwa, ku bebitontome, ku baana abatambulira wansi, ku baana abali mu siniya n’akamalirizo, ku senior high, ku yunivasite, ne kati nga bali bakulu — guleese embeera ezitaggwaawo ez’okukula kw’omuntu n’essanyu erisinga nnyo ebyo bye nnali nalowooza. Naye nga bwe kiri mu bufumbo, n’okukuza abaana bulungi kwetaaga obugendererwa; olina okusalawo, n’oluvannyuma okubaako ky’okola. Olw’obukulu bw’obuvunaanyizibwa bw’okukuza abaana, Essuula 9 ne 10 zitunuulira nnyo ensonga eno.

Kisoboka

Ffe ffena twagala okukuza abaana abeesiga era abawulize.

Ebyo byombi bisoboka, era buli omu ku ffe alina obusobozi okubikola bulungi. Nakomawo okukubaganya ebiroowozo oba nnandibadde muzadde mulungi. Nze ne Char twamukisa okuba n’abazadde abaali balaga ekitundu ekirungi eky’okwagala n’okukangavvula abaana. Maama wa Char omukulu ennyo era omutegeevu yajja e Canada okutuyamba omwana waffe Dan bwe yazaalibwa. Naye ye yatuwa n’amagezi amalungi ag’omutindo ogw’okulabirira abaana.

Nga tetunnava e Canada okugenda e Korea, twagenda mu Basic Youth Conflicts Seminar eyayolekebwa Bill Gothard, eyatuyamba nnyo. Mu myaka egyasooka egy’e 1970, Char bwe yali ayigiriza eby’obufumbo n’ennyumba y’Abakristaayo e Korea, twasoma n’ebitabo ebirala eby’omugaso ennyo ng’Dare to Discipline eya Dr. James Dobson ne The Christian Family eya Larry Christianson. Ebitabo bino byakulirwa nnyo mu kuyigiriza abantu ku kukuza abaana, era amadduuka g’ebitabo eby’Abakristaayo galina bino oba ebirala ebiggya era ebirungi ennyo.

Oluvannyuma, nawulira n’omusomo ogwali ku mateeka ogwa Charlie Shedd. Mu bigambo ebiddako, ojja okulabamu ebimu ku bye twayiga okuva mu by’obugagga bino byonna. Abantu abazadde baabwe abaali ekyokulabirako kirungi balina omukisa munene. Naye wadde nga omuntu teyalina bazadde balungi ng’ekyokulabirako, waliwo ebitabo bingi n’abantu abamaze okukuza abaana bulungi abasobola okubeera ekyokulabirako. Essuula eno n’eddako zijja kukuyamba okutandika ku lugendo luno.

Abaana bakula ne bafuuka abantu abakulu.

 Ekyo kiyinzika okulabika ng’ekintu ekitegeerekeka mangu nnyo, naye engeri gye tukolaamu nga bakulu eraga nti emirundi mingi tetukitegeera bulungi oba tetukikkiriza ddala. Bwe tufaayo okutawulira oba okutyoza abaana baffe, kiba nga tulaga nti tetubabalira muwendo. Abaana bantu, era okukula kwabwe kwa mugaso nnyo.

Okubaweesa ekitiibwa, okubanyumirwa, okubalaga okwagala, n’okumala nabo obudde – byonna byazimba obw’omukwano obw’amaanyi wakati waffe nabo, obweyongera okukula ne bwazinga nga kati bafuuse bakulu. Obw’omukwano obwo bwatufuula n’obukwano obulungi mu kubayigiriza amakubo ga Mukama, nga tuyita mu mbeera ennungi n’empisa ennungi.

Bw’owozesa n’obwegendereza ku mugaso, ku muwendo, n’empeera eziva mu kukuza abaana, naawe osobola okukola bulungi. Totya – naye olina okutwala obuzadde nga nsonga nkulu nnyo.

Ebisalawo n’eby’Okusooka mu Bintu

Ekitundu ekisooka ekikulu nnyo mu kukuza abaana abesiga kwe kusalawo mu bugenderevu okukikola. Olina okukkiriza nti omugaso gw’okukuza abaana abesiga era abawulize gusinga nnyo ku ssente, ku budde, ne ku maanyi g’okugikola. Bw’otakkiriza ekyo, oyinza okusalawo nti si kirungi kubeera n’abaana. Kitegeerere bulungi nti kukuza abaana abeeyisa obulungi era abeetwala nga bannakyewa butwala budde bungi, era weewandiise wamu ne mukyala wo oba musajja wo mu kusalawo okwo nga musaba Katonda. Obuzadde bujjudde emigaso mingi nnyo, naye tebulimu buzibu n’obutafunako. Bw’obala ensonga ezo mu maaso, ojja kubeera mwetegefu okwetaba mu myaka egy’obuvunaanyizibwa egiddira essanyu ly’okubeerako omwana omuggya. Mu ngeri etegeerekeka nga kyewunyisa, ensonga ezo ze zijja okuba ennima ey’enjawulo ey’okukula mu by’omwoyo. Mu nteekateeka ya Katonda, buli omu bw’awa, buli omu afuna — n’oyo awa.

Entandikwa esooka kwe kwetegekera abaana. Okwetegekera kitegeeza bintu eby’enjawulo eri abantu ab’enjawulo. Ka kibeere mu biteeso by’omutima, mu by’omwoyo oba mu by’ensimbi, abaana balina okuweebwa ekifo eky’essanyu era balindibwa n’essanyu. Okwetegekera mu by’omutima n’eby’omwoyo kulina okusooka okusinga okutegeera ku by’ensimbi oba ebirala. Si kibi eri abafumbo okusalawo okubeera nga tebazaala. Mu mbeera ezimu, ekisalawo ng’ekyo kiyisa ku bukulu bw’obwenge n’okulowooza okw’amaanyi. Naye mu mbeera endala, singa abaana tebagenda kusiimibwa n’okulindwa mu ssanyu, kirungi nnyo obutaba na bo okusinga okukuza abaana aba buzibu era abafuuka abantu abakulu aba buzibu. Kinyumu nnyo okulaba abaana abakula mu mbeera etategekeddwa, etasiimiddwa, era etalina kkomo. Tewali ayagala kuba na baana aba buzibu. Ky’ekisinga obulungi, obutaba bazadde.

Obuzadde butwala budde n’okweyambisa. Abantu abakulu emirundi mingi beekubiriza nti tebaamala budde bumala n’abaana baabwe. Ka tube nga twakola bubi mu biseera ebyayita, tusobola okukyusa entambula yaffe wakati mu lugendo tulyoke tuleme okwenenyezebwa mu biseera eby’omu maaso. Wamu n’abazadde abalala bangi, nasalawo okussaako budde mu kukuza batabani baffe, era ssimaze na lunaku lumu okwejjusa. Omwana awuliriza era yeesiga aleetera abazadde be essanyu n’okumatira kungi, naye omwana atawuliriza aleetera abazadde be ensonyi.

Mu biseera bingi mu myaka gyaffe 13 gye twamala nga bamisionaali mu Korea, obudde bwe namala ne batabani baffe bwakendeza ku budde bwe nnayina ku mulimu gwange. Nga nkyusaamu ebikulu byange mu mutima, emirundi mingi neebuuza nti,

“Nsobola okulemererwa ng’omumisionaali, naye siiremererwa ng’omuzadde.”

Nnasiima nnyo omulimu gwange ng’omumisionaali era ne mpulira nga gwali gumu ku mirimu egisinga obukulu omuntu yenna gy’ayinza okukola. Wadde bwe bwali bwe bityo, omulimu gwange ogw’obuzadde gwali gunkulu nnyo okusinga omulimu gwange ogw’obumisionaali. Katonda yampa omukisa ne ssiremererwa ng’omumisionaali, era nafuna essanyu lingi nnyo olw’omugabo mutono gwe nakola mu buwanguzi bw’ekkanisa gye twakoleranga mu Korea. Naye ate nategeera nti essanyu erisinga obunene ly’ennina olw’okuba nkuze batabani bange abaawuliriza era abeesiga.

Bwe twali tuteekateeka okuva e-Korea, abayizi baffe bangi abaali bakyuse abaamiisiiri baatukyalira mu nnyumba yaffe. Abakorea b’abantu abeerabirwa empisa ennungi ennyo, era baajja mu bungi mu nnaku ezo ez’okusembayo okutugamba ku bye bajjukira. Abamu baabade bagamba ebigambo ebiringa bino:

“Twayiga bingi okuva gyemwatuwa mu masomero, naye twayiga okusingawo bwe twatukyalira mu maka gammwe. Essanyu lyemulina mu bufumbo bwammwe, n’empisa ennungi, okuwuliriza, n’obulungi bw’empisa za batabani bammwe bituyigizza nnyo ku bulamu bw’amaka g’Abakristaayo.”

Ssente teziyiza kugula ssanyu lyebigambo bino bilya mu myoyo gyaffe.

Abazadde bwe bassako obukulu ku buzaadde okusinga ku mirimu gy’emirimu gyaabwe, bafuna ebizibu bitono nnyo mu nkolagana y’abazadde n’abaana. Ekyewuunyisa, emirimu gyabwe gyona giyitamu bulungi. Enkola eno yatusobozesa okukuza abaana baffe awatali buzibu bunene. Oluvannyuma yatuleetera n’eddembe ddene mu kulondoola emirimu gyaffe okusinga singa twanditandise nga twassa ku mirimu gy’obulamu obw’okukola okusinga ku buzaadde. Ebifaananyi eby’okwawukana kuno biri wonna.

Enkolagana Eri Wakati w’Obuvumu n’Obuwulize

Obuvumu n’obuwulize mu baana baffe bikwatagana nnyo. Okukuza abaana abeesiga era ab’obuvumu, abantu bangi bamanyi nti abazadde balina okuyiga okubaasanyusa n’okubagumya. Kyokka ekyo abantu abamu kye batasuubira kwe kuba nti waliwo enkolagana enzito wakati w’obuvumu n’obuwulize. Omwana awuliza, bw’aba nga ayogerwako obulungi era ng’akuutiddwa abazadde abagezi, yeeyongera okwesiga. Omwana eyeesiga asanyukira nnyo okubeera mu nsalo z’empisa ezimunnyonnyolwa. Amanyi nti ensalo zimugasa, era nti okuzisukka si kirungi gy’ali. Obuvumu n’obuwulize bigumiziganya mu ngeri ennungi.

Ensalo ennambulukufu, ezitakyukakyuka era ezikakasiddwa bulungi ku mpisa ezikkirizibwa zireeta obuvumu n’okukula mu mpisa z’abaana. Abaana bano, ab’omu maaso okufuuka abantu abakulu, bwe batasomesa kuwuliza nga bakyali bato, bafuna obulemu obukulu obubagobera obulamu bwonna. Maama ne Taata balina omukisa n’obuvunaanyizibwa obw’ekitalo okukuza abaana abawulize, abavunaanyizibwa, abafaayo, era abakula mu ngeri ennungi.

Abaana bwe bamanya ensalo zaabwe, bayiga okukolera mu zo n’obuvumu. Naye bwe batasobola kumanya we ziri, batandika okugezaako okugezesa okulaba we ziri. N’olwekyo abaana abatalina nsalo ennambulukufu batera okuba abatya — si ba kwesiga. Abaana abatono bayinza okukwata ku kintu kye bayina kyokka okugambibwa obutakikwataako, nga batunuulira abazadde okulaba oba bagenda okukakasa ekiragiro. Mu baana abakulu, obutamanya nsalo kwerabira mu kubulwa obwesige.

Ku ludda olulala, obuvumu n’obuwulize biva ku bintu bibiri eby’enjawulo. Ekimu kye kussaamu amaanyi — okukubiriza. Kino kijjudde okwagala, okusiima, okuseka, n’okujaguza. Ekirala kye kulagira n’okulaga — okuyigiriza mu bukakafu, mu maanyi, mu kwegayirira okwetegereza, era n’okwagala okulagira. Bino byombi biva mu kwagala, era byombi byetaagisa singa abaana baffe bagenda okufuuka ab’obuvumu era abawulize.

Okussaamu ekitiibwa mu baana kiyamba nnyo okubakuza nga beesiga era nga bawulize. Kiki kitegeeza okussaamu abaana baffe ekitiibwa? Bwe tubassaamu ekitiibwa ddala era ne tutwala ekitiibwa kyabwe nga kikulu, tetujja kubanyoomebwa mu bantu. Ne bwe tubalanga, tubakwatanga mu ngeri ey’obwenkanya. Tujja kwogera ku kulangira mu ngeri enzijuvu mu ssuula eggya. Okulongoosebwa bwe kukolebwa mu ngeri entuufu, tekulemesa kukula kw’obuvumu.

Okugeza, singa waba nga tewali tteeka lyonna lyayolekedwa ku kintu, tekirina kukolebwako kubonerezebwa ku mulundi ogusooka — wabula kuyigiriza kwokka. Abaana bangi tebamanyi nti ekintu kibi okutuusa nga waliwo abakyogerako. Okutuusa n’omwoyo gwabwe (obuvunanyizibwa mu mutima) gugenda gukula era n’okumanya, tuyinza okubawulira okubaleka ku nsonga ey’obwenkanya nga tubabonereza nga bamaze okuyigizibwa bulungi. Bwe tuba tuteekateeka okubabonereza, tuyinza okugamba nti omwana yali agezaako okuba mulungi naye n’akola ensobi. Mu kifo ky’okugamba nti omwana mubi, tuyinza okugamba nti, “Ekyo ky’okoze kibi,” so si nti, “Ggwe mubi.” Tetwagala baana baffe balowooze nti bo bennyini mibi, oba bagezaako okubeera mu ngeri eyo gye balowooza nti balina okubeeramu.

Tewali kusikiganya wakati w’okwagala n’okubonereza. Mu maka gaffe, bwe twabonerezanga abaana, twabagobereranga amangu n’okubalaga okwagala. Okubakwata n’okubannyonnyola (hugs) kubalaga nti tebagaanyiddwa wabula bakyayagalibwa nnyo. Okwagala n’okubakwata tebyawukana na kubonereza okw’obwagazi. Era twalina n’akaseera ak’omwoyo okusaba wamu, tusobole okwewala ekintu ekyo okuddamu okubaawo. Kino kiraga omwana nti mumuwagira ddala era nti tebasanyukira kumubonereza. Okubonereza okukolebwa mu ngeri entuufu kuleeta okuwulira. Okuwulira kusaanira okusiimibwa, era okusiimibwa kuleeta obuvumu.

Mukimanyi nnyo ekigambo ekikulu eky’edda nti, “Abaana balina okulabibwa naye si kuwulirwa.” Naye Char nange tetwakkiriziganya n’ekigambo ekyo. Kituufu nti abaana balina okumanya ddi lwe balina okusirika ne bawulira. Wabula okubakkiriza okwetaba mu by’okwogera (so si kubifuga) kwabiyigiriza okuwaayo ebirowoozo byabwe, okumanya ddi lwe balina okusirika, engeri y’okubuuza ebibuuzo, n’okukkiriza ebirowoozo eby’enjawulo ku byabwe. Twalaba nti kino kyongera nnyo ku mutindo gw’obuvumu bwabwe.

Abaana baffe bwe baali bakula nga batuuse mu myaka gy’obuvubuka, buli omu ku ffe abana n’abazadde bana yali alina eddembe okuyita n’okukulembera olukuŋŋaana lw’amaka ekiseera kyonna, singa wabangawo okulabula okusooka okutereeza enteekateeka zaffe. Okukulembera olukuŋŋaana lwali mukisa gw’okukula mu bukulembeze n’okutegeeza ebirowoozo. Tetwateeka enkola eno ng’ekigendererwa kya kukula mu buvumu bwabwe, naye okumanya nti tubawulira kwateekawo embeera eyasobozesa obuvumu bwabwe okukula.

Beera Muwolereza, Ssi Mulabe

Enkolagana wakati w’abaana abamu n’abazadde baabwe efaanana ng’eri ey’abaabadde mu lutalo. Abazadde batwala mu kusomooza, abaana nebeewonya; abazadde balagira, abaana nebakankana. Kiba kyangu era kisinga okuba eky’essanyu eri amaka gonna singa abaana basanga abazadde baabwe nga baba abawolereza baabwe, ssi balabe baabwe.

Abawolereza b’abaana batwala mu kubakuumira ku mukono ogw’obwagazi, okubatendereza n’okubategeeza ebirungi, era tebabuulira bubi buli kiseera. Bwe baba babagamba ku nsobi, bakikola mu kisa era nebanneenya nga babasobozesa okutegeera mu bwagazi.

Enkolagana eyo ey’obuwolereza ey’abaana etandikira ku mbeera y’omutima. Ekitundu ku kuddamu kikwata ku mbeera y’omutima gw’omuzadde, ate ekirala kijja kwogerwako mu ssuula eddako ku kukulaakulanya abaana abawulize.

Okuwulira kirina okutenderezebwa; obutawulira tekulina. Okukuza abaana abawulize kirina okuba omukago gw’abazadde, era bazadde balina obuvunaanyizibwa bw’okubaziba nga bakoze ensobi. Naye n’okubaziba kiyinza okukolebwa mu ngeri etaggyako essanyu ly’okuba “abakubiriza” b’abaana baabwe.

Waliwo engeri nnyingi mwe tuyinza okulaga abaana baffe nti tuli abawolereza baabwe. Abaana baffe bwe baali bakyali bato, Char yasoma ekintu ekyavaamu okuteekawo etteeka mu maka gaffe: okugamba “yee” okutandika, okuggyako nga waliwo ensonga ennene ey’okugamba “nedda.” Kino kyali kizibu katono mu biseera ebimu, naye kyayamba nnyo abaana baffe okukula bulungi, era kyatuyigiriza n’okuziyiza okubalina nnyo ne tubasumulula mu bwesige.

Twakozesa emisingi gino gye twogeddeko ku luggya lw’amaka gaffe mu luwummula lw’ennyumba gye twagendaamu okwerabirira wamu. Abazzukulu baffe kati bakuze era beekolera ebintu byabwe, naye era bamu ku bo bakyatuubuuza ku bye tubalowoozako ku nsonga ezimu. Tukyakola nnyo okukuuma etteeka lyaffe ery’okugamba “yee” buli lwe kisoboka.

Mutabani waffe omukulu, Dan, yali musomesa atali mufumbo. Mu kiseera ekyo yali abeera n’ennyumba y’Abakorea mu Seoul olw’okusobola okuyiga olulimi. Dan yayagala okutwala mutabani w’ennyumba eyo ow’emyaka 12 ku luwummula lw’amaka gaffe olw’e Alaska. Emikisa gy’okwogera ne Dan gyali mitono nnyo kubanga yali abeera ku ludda olulala olw’ensi. Nze ne Char twandyagadde nnyo okufuna obudde bungi nga tuli ffe ffekka naye okwogera ku nteekateeka ze n’emirimu gye yakola ebweru w’eggwanga. Naye Dan yayagala okugabana obulamu bw’olu luwummula n’omulenzi ono Omukorea eyali afuuse ng’omu ku maka ge amaggya. Tetwamukakata ku byatuloowoozako. Wabula nate twagamba nti, “Yee.”

Mazima waaliwo ebizibu ebitono olw’okutwala omuntu atali wa maka era ow’olulimi olulala, naye twafuna ebiganyulo bingi. Twalaba Dan ng’akola bulungi mu buwangwa bw’Abakorea. Twamuwulira ng’ayogera olulimi lwe twakozesa mu myaka gyaffe egy’omu Korea. Ate era Omukorea ono yafuna omukisa okulaba Alaska n’amaka g’Abamerika era yakwata ne ssamuni! Yatwala n’ekijjukizo kino n’ekifaananyi n’akibikira obulamu bwe bwonna.

Mu myaka egyaddirira, nazimba ebifo eby’okubuukira ku pikipiki eri abaana baffe abali mu siniya, nagenda mu bifo bingi, nakola ebintu bingi era ne ndya emmere gye ssaalirangako kukkiriza — byonna nga biva ku nteekateeka yaffe ey’okugamba “yee” buli lwe kisoboka. Obutaba na bulungi kwe nafuna bwali butono nnyo, naye amagoba ag’omu mukwano gwange ne batabani baffe gaali manene nnyo.

Era twasalawo nga bakyali bato nti buli kibuuza kyonna batabani baffe kye baba balina obutegeevu okukibuuza, twali tugenda kukibaddamu. Nnabadde ndaba n’ennaku nnyo abazadde nga bagamba abaana babo abalina amagezi nti tebateekwa kubuuza bibuuzo bingi. Ffe tetwabagamba nti, “Tebateekwa kubuuza bibuuzo bingi,” wabula twabagamba nti, “Ekibuuzo ekyo kirungi.” Twalowooza nti singa babadde bategeera okukola ekibuuzo, baali basaanidde n’okufuna eky’okubaddamu ekiwulikika bulungi. Nga bibuuzo bya batabani baffe bwe byakula, bwe kityo n’emboozi zaffe zakula. Emirundi mingi enteekateeka eno yatutuusa ku nsonga abazadde n’abaana abamu ze batabeerangaako, naye tetwabadde twenoonyerezaako. Tetwalowooza okukyusa enteekateeka eno. Emirundi mitono, obwangu obw’obwesige mu mukwano gwafe bwannyonnyola nange okubuuzanga ebibuuzo ebikulu. Leero, batabani baffe bakyabuuza ebibuuzo ebirungi.

Nze ne Char twakuumanga obuyinza bw’“okwogera mu bwangu” mu maka gaffe, ne bwe kyandiba nga kye kukakasa endowooza zaffe ffe ffekka. Twali twagala abaana baffe beeyimirire ku magezi gaabwe. Enkola eno yajja mu bwangu nga tetugitunuulidde nnyo. Naye lumu nnazuula obukulu bw’enkola eno mu kusisinkana okwali mu nnyumba ya bazadde bange nga mujjudde ab’eŋŋanda n’abazzukulu bangi. Mu mbeera y’okulya emmere, omu ku batabani baffe yakola okunenyeenya okutono ku nze nga tekuliimu kabi. Omu ku baganda bange n’agamba nti, “Abaana bange bandiimbye bannenyeenya nga bwe bakoze. Tetwalibadde na kigambo ng’ekyo mu maka gaffe.” Nze ne mmuddamu nti, “Mu maka gaffe tulina eddembe ly’okwogera.” Ennaku ntono bwe zaayita nga buli omu amaze okuddayo ewabwe, batabani baffe batugamba nti abazzukulu baabwe baali bewuunya nnyo olw’obwangu n’obwesige mu mukwano gwafe. Okuleka abaana baffe babuuze n’okutuyigganya ku ndowooza zaffe kwatuwa omukisa okuddamu okwetegereza amateeka gaffe okulaba oba gali mazima. Era kwabawa n’omukisa okuyiga okuva mu kubaddamu kwaffe ku bibuuzo byaabwe eby’“Lwaki?” Okubagamba nti, “Kubanga nze nkwagambye,” si kyeyongera kukulaakulanya ebirowoozo eby’amagezi era eby’okwekenneenya eby’abasajja abaato be twali twagala okukuza. Kirungi okubeera omuwagizi okusinga okubeera omuzigu.

Okuteeka obudde mu by’omugaso

Ebitundu kumpi byonna eby’emitwe egiyogerwako mu ssuula eno ne mu ssuula eddako byetaaga obudde. Obuzadde bwe buba ekintu ekikulu mu bulamu bwo, okutwala obudde okukola ebintu mu ngeri entuufu tekiba kizibu. Okuzannya n’abaana kyetaaga obudde. Okwogera nabo kyetaaga obudde. Okubalangirira n’okubagunjula mu ngeri ey’obuvunaanyizibwa kyetaaga obudde — era emirundi emimu kino kiba mu biseera ebiteewunyisa. Singa okutwala obudde okutandikirawo okuba ng’okukooya, kino kiyinza okuba akabonero nti ebintu by’otwala nga bikulu bikyuse. Buli muntu afuna obudde ku ebyo by’atwala nga bikulu. Okukuza abaana abeesiga era abawulira kye kikulu gy’oli? Okumala obudde obw’enjawulo n’omwana buli omu — mu biseera eby’essanyu era eby’okuwummula — wamu n’okuba wamu nga famire yonna, kuleeta ebibala binene nnyo mu kukula kw’omwana. Mu famire yaffe, twanyumirizibwa nnyo emirimu egy’awamu n’egy’omuntu ku muntu, ebyasanyusa omwana n’okumumanyisa nti wa muwendo. Ebitabo bingi ebikwata ku buzaale biraga enkola eno, era yatukolera bulungi nnyo. Okwogera okuva ku mutima okututuuka ku mutima kusooka kubaamu nga muli babiri bokka. Emitwe gino egigunjulwako empisa gyetaaga okutwalibwa mu bwangu n’obugumiikiriza: eddembe n’obuvunaanyizibwa, okulonda ebigambo by’oyogera, okubeera omuwombeefu, obutafaayo ku balala, enneewulira, okulindirira olunaku lwo, n’okufuga olulimi. Okumala obudde obumala wamu kutuwa omukisa okulaga n’okunnyonnyola ebintu bino mu ngeri entuufu. Ekiganyulo ekisinga mu kumala obudde mu ngeri ey’enjawulo n’abaana be mukisa ogw’okulongoosa obuteebulungirivu bwabwe, obwesigwa bwabwe, n’obukuzza mu by’obukulu. Empisa zino ziggulawo omulyango gw’obuvunaanyizibwa obusingawo. Era obuvunaanyizibwa buno buwa omwana omukisa gw’okukula mu kwesiga okw’amaanyi. Obukuzza abaana bange be baalina nga bali mu myaka 15 ne 16 bwampa obuvumu okubasaba okwegulira mmotoka zaabwe bokka. Obukuzza obwo bwakula olw’obudde bwe twamala wamu mu myaka egyasooka. Twali mikwano era enkolagana yaffe yali nnywevu. Kubanga twali tumaze okuyimba enkolagana mu buto bwabwe, baali basanyufu nnyo okumala obudde ne Taata mu myaka gyabwe egy’obuvubuka. Kino nali nkyagala nnyo, era nanyumirizibwa obudde bwe twamala nga tukolera wamu ku mmotoka ezo.

Okutondawo Enkola ey’Okutegeeragana n’Okwogera Awamu

Emboozi ezisinga obulungi ze twafuna ne batabani baffe zaabadde tezitegekeddwa era nga zitalina nteekateeka ey’amaanyi. Mazima ddala, nandisobola okutuuza omu ku batabani bange ne mmugamba nti, “Nina ensonga musanvu ze njagala twogerako,” ne ntandika okuzisomooza emu ku emu okuva ku lukalala. Naye wabaawo embeera ey’enjawulo nnyo bwe mbagamba nti, “Kale, leka tuzanye okusimba Frisbee.” Tuba tutambuza ebigambo nga tuzannya era ne tusanyuka ddala okuba awamu. Tukyasobola okutuuka ku nsonga zonna musanvu, naye mu ngeri ennyangu, eterabika nga eya bulijjo.

Bwe baali bakyali bato, emizannyo egyangu oba okugenda nabo mu mirimu emitono byatuteerawo obudde obw’okwogera. Oluvannyuma bwe baatandika okuba n’enteekateeka ezisinga okuba nnyingi, twalina okuba abegendereza n’okweetegekera obudde obwo mu ngeri ey’enjawulo. Bwe baagenda nga bakula, baatandika okukola emirimu ne beeterekera ensimbi zaabwe. Baasanyuka nnyo era ne beewuunya bwe baali nga bali ku myaka 15 ne 16, bwe nabaweebwa olukusa okugula mmotoka singa baayagala. Babadde balina okuvunaanyizibwa ku buli kimu ekisasulwa, naye nnandi bayambanga mu biwandiiko era nga ndi mwetegefu okuzirejista mu linnya lyange. Obudde bwe twamala mu myaka wakati w’okusooka okugula mmotoka zaabwe n’okugenda okuva mu maka bwali bwa mugaso nnyo. Bwe nziraba emabega ku ssanyu n’omulimu gwe twakola awamu, mpulira okumatira okungi nnyo.

Eddaala eryasooka mu nkola eno lyali kusalawo mmotoka ki ey’okugula. Baalaba ebirango mu lupapula lw’amawulire. Twagenda emirundi mingi okugula mmotoka mu mmotoka y’amaka yaffe ey’obuwendo. Kino kyantegeeza nti nnali ntuuse okwetaba mu nkola eno era oluusi ne mbuuza oba ne nziramu ekibuuzo. Twogerako ku bintu nga okuvvaamu kw’omuwendo gwa mmotoka bwe wagenda mu biseera, n’omugaso gw’okukozesa omukanika okukebera bbulake n’ebitundu ebirala nga tonnagula. Twogerako ne ku kusalawo obulungi mmotoka ng’ogiraba mu ngeri y’obanga erina mailo emeka ezikyasigalidde mu yo, si mu ngeri y’obanga erina mailo emeka ze kimaze okukola. Dan yagula Volvo enkadde eyali ekyasobola okumala ebbanga, ate Joel yagula Audi — zombi nga zirina mailo nnyingi nnyo ezikyasigalidde mu zo. Bwe nziraba emabega ku ebyo bye twayitamu, ndowooza nga kyali kyenkana era kya bulijjo nnyo okuyamba abalenzi okukula mu busobozi bw’okugula, okukebera, n’okusalawo obulungi.

Mmootoka za bombi zaali zeetaaga omulimu. Simanyi ssawa mmeka ez’omuwendo Dan nange ze twamala nga twetegekera Volvo ye okuweebwa langi. Sikyajjukira kye twogerako, naye njukira nti twasanyuka nnyo nga tuli wamu. Audi ya Joel eyali ya langi ya ffeeza yaali yeetaaga okulongoosebwa ku mubiri. Twayiga bingi nnyo bwe twakuba ebifo ebyali bizimbye ennyenje, ne tubiziba, ne tubisengeka, era ne tubizimbulukusa. Bwe twamaliriza omulimu guno, mmotoka yalabika bulungi nnyo, era n’enkolagana ya kitaawe n’omwana nayo yali mu mbeera nnungi nnyo. Audi yayimirira mu luguudo lw’awaka lwaffe okumala wiiki eziwerako nga elindirira olunaku lw’amazaalibwa ga Joel olw’emyaka 16. Bwe yagenda okugikozesa omulundi gwe ogwasooka, muyiseeko ani eyagenda naye? Yanzisa. Yatandika yingini, n’oluvannyuma n’agamba nti, “Taata, leka tusabe.” Bwe yatandika okusaba, nawulira nga yeewaayo mmotoka, engeri gy’anaagikozesa, n’emboozi ezinaabeeramu eri Mukama. Nnali mugenyi mu mmotoka ye era ne nneetaba mu bulamu bwe. Nga kibeera kya ngeri ki okulaba empisa n’omugaso gw’obulamu nga biyita mu mirembe egigoberera!

Twogerako ku nsonga enkulu, naye sijjukira oba twazogerako mu biseera ebyo bye twamalanga nga tukola ku mmotoka oba mu mbuuliriganya ezaabaddewo wakati mu mirimu egyo. Naye ekyo kye njukira ddala kwe kuba nti sigenda kweddayo kwekubira nga nneyongedde obudde obwetaagisa okukuuma mmotoka zombi n’enkolagana zaffe.

Olumu, Joel yaleeka amafuta mu Audi ye ne gasigala matono nnyo era ekintu ekimu ne kiva mu yingini ye ne kimenya. Namanya emyezi emeka Joel gye yamala ng’ateeka ensimbi awamu okugula mmotoka eyo. Era namanya n’emyezi emirala emeka gye yamala ng’ateekateeka ensimbi $900 ze zaalina okusasulwa okuddaabiriza yingini. Bwe twasika mmotoka ye n’omuguwa okugituusa mu garaji gy’okuddaabiriza ku lunaku olumu olw’empewo n’obudde obukadde, saamuwa magezi “ag’abantu abakulu.” Emabegako nnyo nnali namwogerako ku bipimo by’amafuta, enkyukakyuka zago, n’okunyigirizibwa kwaago, naye ku kiro ekyo teyeetaaga kunzijukiza! Abaana baffe bwe bayita mu by’obuyigirize bino, tebeetaaga kubonerezebwa n’okulabirirwa mu bigambo bingi — beetaaga buyambi. Okubawa omukono gw’obuyambi, nga tetubagamba nti, “Nnakugamba dda,” kikuuma enkolagana nga nzigule eri eby’obuyigirize ebirala bye baba basaba oba bye baba bawera.

Mu kyeya kyaffe ekyasembayo mu Korea — mu 1985 — nze ne batabani bange twatambula ku lusozi lwa Chirisan okumala kiro mita 120 okuva ku kabin yaffe e Wangshiribong (Kings Bowl Peak) okutuuka e Chunwangbong (Thousand Kings Peak), olusozi olusinga obuwanvu mu South Korea, ne tuddayo. Twamalayo ennaku ttaano. Mu bbugguulu zaffe twetisse eweema n’ebintu byonna ebyali byetaagisa okulala n’okulya mu kiseera kyonna. Twogera ne tuseka ebbanga ddene nnyo eryo, ate ne tukaaba ne twenyamira olw’obuzito bwa mitwalo gyaffe mu kiseera ekitono. Ku lunaku olwasembayo twazuukira mu nkuba entonotono, ne tusazaawo ekifo kyaffe, ne tutambula olunaku lulamba mu nkuba. Abalenzi baffe bakula mu bugumu bw’omubiri n’omutima, mu kugumiikiriza, mu kukolagana, n’obusobozi bw’okukubiriza abalala. Ate era twongera nnyo okunyweza obw’omukwano bwaffe. Sijjukira kye twogerako. Naye ekyo kye mmanyi ddala kwe kuba nti kati nga batabani bange bava dda mu maka okumala emyaka mingi, bombi bawuliriza bulungi bannaabwe, batya abantu b’emyaka gyonna, baagala Katonda, era banoonya Ye n’okwagala kwe n’omutima ogw’omwoyo ogukutte. Waliwo mu ssaawa ezo ze twamalira wamu we bakulira mu busobozi obumu obw’omuwendo.

Okutambuza Empisa okuva mu Mirembe egy’Okuddirira okutuuka mu Ggya egigoberera

Empisa ziyita mu ngeri ya bulijjo okuva mu mirembe egigoberera okutuuka mu gigya nga bazadde bwe bassa obudde bungi mu kusanyuka n’abaana baabwe. Tulina okubawa obudde obumala era mu bugabi. Kikulu nnyo okukuuma obw’omukwano obulungi obwateekebwa mu myaka egyasooka era mpolampola ne tuteeka mu nkola emirimu egisanyusa omuvubuka egy’okwegatta n’ebirabo bye (si byabazadde byokka). Okubeera okumpi okwo kutereeza ekkubo ery’okutambula okwenjawulo okw’ebirowoozo n’empisa. Ebirowoozo eby’amaanyi n’empisa ziwanyisibwa era ne zifuna ekifo mu mitima gyaffe mu mbuuliriganya eterina kukozesa bukugu bw’okulimba oba okukakasa — era okuyiga kubaawo ku mpande zombi. Bombi bawangula.

Tosobola kutambuza empisa ku mugaso gw’omwoyo ogutaggwaawo mu kaseera katono. Ekigambo ekitono tekisobola okutuusa obukulu bwa Katonda, amaanyi Ge, ekitiibwa Kye, n’okusaasira Kwe okw’okwagala okutuufu. Abantu tebasobola kutuukiriza mangu obusobozi bw’okutegeera omuwendo gw’obulongoofu mu mwoyo n’omubiri. Kiyita mu budde okutegeera ebirungi ebiri mu kubeera n’ebirowoozo, omutima, n’omubiri ebirongoofu mu maaso ga Katonda. Waliwo amaanyi agabeera mu muntu abeera mu kwagala kwa Katonda, alina okukkiriza okw’amaanyi n’obwesige mu bufuga bwa Katonda, era ategeera nti Katonda ye muyambi abeera buli kiseera mu budde bw’obwetaavu — bino byonna bye biteeso ebiyisibwa mu mbuuliriganya nnyingi nga batambula ku nsozi oba nga bagenda mu lift ez’okuski. Tusobola okutambuza empisa zino ennene okuva mu mirembe egigoberera okutuuka mu gigya mu mbeera y’emboozi eyakawungeezi mu kabin ey’oku lusozi nga empewo efulumya mu miti ebweru. Mu biseera ebyo, bazadde basobola okunyweza omugaso ogw’eby’obulamu n’obuntu ogw’okusaba. Eno y’engeri y’okutambuza omukono omukulu ogw’obuvunaanyizibwa — okumanya nti amawanga gakyuusibwa era n’obulamu bugobererwamu ebipya olw’amaanyi g’okusaba mu bigambo by’abantu. Empisa zino zituusibwa nga bazadde n’abaana balwana n’ebizibu ebiva ku mwana atali mulungi mu kitundu oba ku mupolisi wa sitenseni atategeera mbeera. Kiyita mu budde okuyiga okutwala ebizibu byaffe eri Katonda mu kifo ky’okwekolera ku buli kusunguwala n’obulumi ffe ffekka.

Abaana bwe bamanya engeri y’okugondera, tusobola okubeesiga. Bwe tusobola okubeesiga, baba basaanidde okuweebwa obuvunaanyizibwa obusinga obunene n’eddembe erisinga — bino byonna ge mazima ag’amaanyi era agasanyusa nnyo. Abaana baffe beetegefu okuyiga bino singa tuyitamu nabo okutambula ku buguwa obutono obwetoloola ekibuga ne tubyogerako. (Mu Ssuula ya 10, twogerako ku kiki ekinaakolebwa singa okuyigiriza okugondera kyetaaga ebisinga okutambula n’okwogerako.) Omulembe omuggya guyiga gutya omuwendo gw’ebintu ebitali bya nsi eno era ne gugana empisa z’omulembe guno ez’okwagalira eby’obugagga, okusanyuka kw’omubiri, n’obutakkiriza? Okutambuza empisa zino gwe mulimu ogusinga obukulu — era ogutwala obudde bungi — gw’omuzadde.

Obukuumi mu Mbeera ezirimu Akabi

Ensi ejjudde akabi akawerako, akalabika n’akalabika butalabika. Tetuyinza kukakasa nti tukaleka ddala, naye tusobola okuyiga engeri y’okwongeza ku bukuumi nga tuyita mu mbeera z’akabi. Ku Sande emu akawungeezi bwe twali tuba e Taejon, nze ne batabani baffe abaali bakyali mu masomero ag’obuto twatambula ku bbaala zaffe za bbaasikiriita nga tutambula mu kibuga. Mu kiseera ekyo mu Taejon, tewaaliwo nteekateeka y’entambula etambulira ku misiri, okulindirira, okuwa ekkubo, oba n’okutambula mu mirembe. Waliwo ebigaali ebyasikirizibwa embalaasi, ebyasikirizibwa abantu, n’ebyasikirizibwa ente. Waliwo bbaasi, emmotoka ennene, takisi, bbaasikiriita za yingini, motosayiko, n’ebbulu n’ebbaasikiriita nnyingi, byonna nga bikolera ku mateeka gaabyo egy’enjawulo. Omuzadde w’abalenzi ab’avubuka abakula mu mbeera y’entambula eyo akola atya okusigala nga alina omutwe mulamu? Ekiddamu kyange kyali kubatwala ebweru ne mbayigiriza. Bwe twali tutambula, twogerako ku ntambula, ku ngeri mmotoka gye zayitanga ku njuyi zombi eza bbaasi, emirundi mingi nga ziyingirira mu kkubo lya bbaasikiriita. Twalaba engeri bbaasi gye zaavuganga nga zikozesa amaloboozi gaazo amangi okusinga okuddiriza n’obugonvu. Twayiga engeri y’okutegeka obudde bwaffe mu ntambula n’okuteekateeka dda okumanya ekiseera ekituufu eky’okukwata amatala g’entambula. Ate era twasanyuka nnyo ne tufuna n’okukola ku mubiri.

Bwe twasenguka ne tuba e Seoul, batabani baffe baali bakuze era emirundi mingi baavuganga bbaasikiriita zaabwe mailo ssatu oba nnya mu ntambula ya Seoul okugenda ku ssomero. Kino kyabateekanga okutambula ku limu ku bitundu ebitambuka ku mugga Han ebiri ebitambudde nnyo era eby’abantu bangi. Oyinza okwebuuza engeri batabani baffe gye baakikolanga. Ate era oyinza n’okwebuuza engeri nze ne Char gye twakikolanga. Tetwalina kutya kubanga twabayigiriza engeri y’okubeera abakuumi mu mbeera y’akabi. Waliwo eby’obuyigirize ebisinga eby’omubiri byokka ebiyinza okufunibwa okuva mu byatuyitamu bino. Emirundi mingi tuyisa abaana baffe mu bukuumi obw’amaanyi ennyo, ate oluvannyuma ne baba nga tebamanyi kweyimiriza mu kabi mu bulamu bwabwe bennyini. Oluvannyuma mu mirimu gye, Dan yabeeranga yekka mu nsi endala, ng’ayiga olulimi olulala era nga yeetegekera okutwala enjiri mu ggwanga eririna obulabe eri Abakristaayo, Katonda lye yateeka ku mutima gwe. Bwe alituukayo, anaabeeranga mu kabi naye nga mukumiddwa. Joel ye mufuzi w’ennyonyi ey’amaanyi eya F-15E erina obusobozi bw’okusuula bbomu ez’amagezi okuva mu bbanga okutuuka ku nnyonyi endala n’oku nsi. Ate era ffe tetukyali na kutya. Si kubanga batabani baffe bali mu bifo ebitaliimu kabi, wabula kubanga batabani baffe bamanyi engeri y’okubeera abakuumi.

Twali tutambula ku nsozi eziri okumpi ne kabin yaffe mu kitundu eky’obukiikakkono bw’ekizinga kya Korea. Bwe twatuukanga ku ntikko y’olusozi nga waliwo okulaba obulungi ennyo okudda emabega n’emunsi w’olusozi, nnatuulanga ku lwazi nga ntadde ebigere byange nga binyweredde okumpi n’ebbali. Nga nkakasa nti ekitundu kyonna eky’emabega w’amagulu gange kinyweredde bulungi ku lwazi, nnagenda mpola mpola ne ntuuka ku bbali ne nteeka ebigere byange nga biddaniridde mu bbanga. Buli omu ku batabani bange yatuulanga n’akola bw’atyo mu ngeri ey’obwegendereza. Bwe twatuulanga awo, twogerako ku lwaki kyandibadde kya busiru okuyimirira ne tufuula omubiri gwaffe gwonna mu mpewo. Twogerako ku kunnywerera ku lwazi n’emigaso gy’okukuumira wakati gw’omubiri gwaffe wansi. Era twalaba n’amakadde ag’enjawulo ag’omu ggulu. Twaalaba engeri gye gaagenda mu byerekezo eby’enjawulo n’amaserengeta ag’enjawulo kubanga empewo yali ekola ebintu eby’enjawulo ku bugulumivu obw’enjawulo. Twogerako ku nnyonyi ezitambula waggulu era ne tuyiga ku mpewo eziva wansi nga ziddamu waggulu. Bino bye biseera bye ndowoozaako nga nzijukira n’okusanyuka. Ndowooza ku ngeri batabani baffe gye bali ab’okwefuga leero mu mbeera ezirimu okunyigirizibwa n’okubonerezebwa. Bwe mbalaba nga beeyisa mu bukuumi mu nsi yaffe ejjudde akabi, nsanyuka olw’obudde obwo bwe twamala awamu. Mazima ddala, buli muzadde alina okukebera obukula, obusobozi n’okwetegekera kwa buli mwana okufuna okuyigirizibwa okw’engeri eno. Newakubadde nga obwangu bwaffe mu mbeera ezirimu akabi buyinza okwawukana, okussa obudde mu ngeri ey’ekigendererwa mu kuyigiriza abaana engeri y’okukwata akabi ak’omubiri kuleeta ebibala ebingi. Batabani bange baabwetaaga era n’abaana bo nabo babwetaaga. Naye mu mbeera z’akabi ak’obuntu oba ak’omwoyo, nga kwawukana n’okubeera mu bukuumi nga tuli mu kabi ak’omubiri oba okumpi nako, ekifo ekisinga okuba mu bukuumi kwe kusigala wala nnyo nako.

Okuleka Okutwala

Abaana bwe batandika okukula ne bafuuka abavubuka, kirungi okutandika okuggyawo ku kulungamya okungi. Mu nkolagana ezisinga obulungi, okwesiga n’okugondera bikula bulungi mu myaka egy’obuto, egy’omusingi ogw’obulamu. Bwe kituuka ku budde obw’okuleka abavubuka n’abantu abavubuka abalala okwetwala mu bulamu, abazadde n’abavubuka bombi baba beetegese era nga basanyukira eddembe eryo. Ffe twatwala entambula okugiteekateekera ekyo.

Mu kyeya kya 1987, omwaka gumu ng’okuva lwe twakomawo mu United States okuva e Korea, Char ne batabani baffe baali bagenda okumala wiiki emu mu kambi y’abavubuka. Nze nasigala ewaka nzekka okumaliriza “okumaliriza” ekifo ky’ansi mu nnyumba yaffe. Dan yali alina emyaka 16 era yali atandise okuvuga, ate Joel yali akakyali 15. Sijjukira nti twali twayogerako ku nsonga y’abalenzi okugula mmotoka zaabwe. Bwe nnali nkola omulimu, nawuliriza akateyipu ka Charlie Shedd akalimu omutendera gw’ebyokuyigiriza omuyigiriza abazadde okulekerawo n’okwesiga abavubuka baabwe abakula. Yali mutendera mulungi nnyo, era ngugamba abazadde okuguliriza. Ebyo bye yayogera byankwata ku mutima mu ngeri ennungi, era mangu oluvannyuma lw’abalenzi okudda okuva mu lugendo lwabwe, nnayita olukiiko lw’aba famire okusaba abalenzi balowooze ku kugula mmotoka zaabwe. Okukula kw’empisa zaabwe, okuwulira obuvunaanyizibwa, okweyimiriza ku lwabwe, n’okukula mu bw’ekulu byali mu birowoozo byange; ate ettendo n’obwangu bw’okuba n’emmotoka zaabwe byali mu byabwe. Nneebaza Katonda nti natwala eddaala eryo.

Char nange twamanyi nti twali twagala okudda mu mulimu gw’obumisiyoni mangu nga batabani baffe bamaze okutandikawo obulamu bwabwe mu by’eby’obusomi. Twagamba Dan ne Joel nti tujja kubawa byonna bye beetaaga okutuusa lwe balina okutikkira okuva mu ssomero ly’okusooka (high school). Naye baali balina okwevunaanyizibwa ku nteekateeka z’ensimbi zaabwe ku by’okusoma mu yunivasite. Mu ngeri etaalabika, abalenzi tebagula mmotoka zaabwe zokka wabula n’engoye zaabwe zonna mu myaka gya high school. Okuba nti baali beesiga nnyo mu kusasula emirimu gyabwe kwatuyamba nze ne Char kubanga twali tutandika ekkanisa empya era nze nnali nkoma okumaliriza pulogulaamu yange ey’okusoma eyasembayo. Naye omugaso ogusinga obunene gwali mu kukula kw’obwetufu bwabwe, okweyimiriza ku lwabwe, okwesiga kwabwe, obuvumu, n’obukulu mu bw’omutima. Si buli muntu alina okukola ddala nga ffe bwe twakola, naye twalaba nti okuwa abaana eddembe lyabwe, okubawa obuvunaanyizibwa, n’okukuliza empisa zaabwe byonna byagenda wamu. Augustine, omukulembeze w’ekkanisa ow’emyaka gya dda mu North Africa, yayigiriza obuvunaanyizibwa bw’omuntu ng’agamba nti, “Yagala Katonda era okole kyonna ky’oyagala.” Kale bwe batabani baffe bwe baagendanga mu mmotoka zaabwe n’emikwano gyabwe, emirundi mingi twabagambanga nti, “Twala Yesu naawe era weesanyuke.” Twamusekereranga era ne tuseka nabo nga bava mu nnyumba, oluvannyuma ne tukyuka ne tutunuulira bannaffe ne tuwanyisiganya okutunuulira okw’abantu abazadde abeesigwa era abalina essuubi.

Mu mwaka gwabwe ogwasembayo mu high school, mu kwetegerezanya wakati waabwe n’affe, buli omu ku batabani baffe yafuna enkyukakyuka mu mbeera ye. Baafuuka abagenyi abakulu mu nnyumba yaffe; tekyali kyetaagisa kufuna lukusa lwaffe ku bintu bye baakolanga. Baali batutegeeza we baabadde n’ekiseera lwe baali bagenda okudda, naye si mu ngeri y’okunoonya lukusa. Kyali kisa kyokka kubanga baali bbeera mu nnyumba yaffe. Twali twagala bayige okusalawo bennyini nga tukyali awo okubaayamba. Twawulira nti kino kyandibayambyeko okwanguyirwa okwenyweza mu bwetufu obujjuvu bwe bandiva ewaka. Tuli basanyufu nti twabaawa eddembe mu mutendera gwe baali bawufuna. Kyatusobozesa okwewala ddala enkolagana ey’obulabe erabika emirundi mingi mu “mpataaganya w’emirembe.” Emirundi mingi mpataaganya w’emirembe si kintu kirala wabula kyokka okuddamu okw’obulijjo okw’omwana omulungi ku kulungamya kw’abazadde okusinga. Tetwabadde tubusiddwa n’akatono olw’eddembe eryo lye twabaawa. Naye waaliwo ebiseera omu ku ffe lwe yalina okutegeeza munne nti enkola eno ekoma ku kufulumya abatuuze abakulu mu bw’omutima. Era twasanyuka nnyo nti twatwala obudde bungi mu myaka gyabwe egy’obuto okubateekateeka okuba abantu abakulu.

Ekiseera ekimu ku bisinga okuba ebizibu mu kumulekerawo eddembe eryo kyali mu mwaka gwa Dan ogwasembayo mu ssomero. Dan yasala okubeera mu magye ga Amerika. Kubanga yali yeetwala ku nsimbi ez’okuyingira mu yunivasite, kino kyandimuyambye okufuna Army College Fund. Era kyandimuyambye n’okulaba ensi endala okusinga Asia yokka nga tannaba kutuula kusoma mu yunivasite. Nga bazadde bangi bwe bakola, twabuuzabuuzibwa engeri gye yasalaamu. Aligenda kusisinkana bantu ba ngeri ki? Aligenda okuddayo ddala okusoma mu yunivasite? Empisa ki z’alifuna? Ebibuuzo byali bingi nnyo nga tebikoma. Naye newakubadde, mu mwezi gwa June 1989, bwe yamaliriza ssomero e Pennsylvania, Dan yasenguka n’agenda e Fort Sill mu Oklahoma. Yatandika omulimu gwe ogw’amagye ng’omu ku bakozi ba Fire Support Specialist. Yatukyala ku Ssekukkulu ogw’omwaka ogwo, n’oluvannyuma n’agenda e Bulaaya mu mwezi ogwaddirira. Twakola bulungi okumwesiga okusalawo okwe yeekolera?

Mu 1991 nga Dan akyali e Germany, ffe twasenguka ne tugenda e China. Mu November 1992, yakomawo mu United States okuva e Germany, n’agula Audi ennungi eyakozesebwa eyamala emyaka mingi. Nga tetumuteekaako kunyigirizibwa, yeeyingiza yekka mu yunivasite, n’asaba Army College Fund, n’atandika omulimu gw’eby’amasomo ogw’obuwanguzi obw’amaanyi. Yamaliriza mu 1996 ng’afunye ekitiibwa era n’afuna diguli ya Bachelor of Science mu kuyigiriza abaana abato (Elementary Education). Okutambula, okubeera mu Bulaaya, n’obulamu bwe yayitamu byamukulaamu nnyo mu bw’omutima. Kati nga ali mu by’amasomo, yali amanyi ebibuuzo by’ayinza okubuuza n’ebintu by’ayinza okukola okufuna ekisinga obulungi mu myaka gye e yunivasite. Dan yasala okusalawo obulungi ku by’amagye, ku yunivasite, ku kkanisa gye yalonda, n’ne ku mikwano gye. Okuyigirizibwa kwaffe okw’emabega n’okumuzikiriza okw’oluvannyuma kwaleeta ebibala. Dan yali mu bukuumi wadde nga ffe twali tuba ebweru w’ensi. Sijja kukakasa okulemesa oba okukendeeza ku kukula kw’omwana olw’okumukuuma ku ddaala limu n’abantu banne. Mulekere akule n’okukula mu kukkiriza kwe okw’omuntu ku bubwe era akulembere banne mu kifo ky’okubagoberera. Tewali kitaawe yenna ku nsi eno asobola okwenyumiriza omwana we okusinga bwe nze nnenyumiriza ku mwana wange leero.

Fuga abaana nga bakyali bato. Oluvannyuma obaleeke bagende. Mukama abayambe abazadde Abakristaayo okuwa abaana baabwe eddimu erikyenkana okuva ku ntandikwa y’obulamu bwabwe, ate n’obusobozi bw’amagezi okubaleeka basale ebisalawo byabwe bennyini bwe baba abavubuka. Bwe tufuga abaana baffe abato mu ngeri entuufu, bajja kukozesa eddembe lyabwe mu ngeri ey’obuvunaanyizibwa bwe baba abavubuka.

Ebyawandiikibwa bigamba nti, “Londoola omwana mu kkubo ly’alina okutambuliramu, era bw’anaakula tew’anaalirekeraamu” (Engero 22:6, ennukuta zange). Ekisinga okuteekebwa ku mutindo mu lunyiriri luno si kuyigiriza mpisa zokka. Kikulu okuyamba omwana okuzuula amaanyi ge n’obusobozi bwe obw’enjawulo. Era tusaanidde okumukubiriza okukula mu ngeri egendana n’ebirabo ebyo. Okubaayamba okuzuula n’okukozesa ebirabo byabwe kubalungamya okufuuka abantu abasinga obulungi be bayinza okuba. Kyeetaagisa obuvumu n’okwesiga abaana baffe n’omulimu gw’Omwoyo Omutukuvu okubaleeka bagende. Okubafuga ennyo nga bali mu myaka gy’obuvubuka kulemesa okukula kwabwe.